The Greedy Pinstripes Presents The Brian Cashman Roast

Since the beginning of the 1998 season the General Manager of the New York Yankees has been a nerdy white guy named Brian Cashman. Cashman took over for Gene Watson and rode the coat tails of the dynasty that Gene Michaels and crew created which included the 1998, 1999 and 2000 World Series winners and the American League pennant winners in 2001 and 2003. While I have defended Cashman in the past he and the new Yankees owner Hal Steinbrenner are making it really hard to defend them anymore and even harder to have any faith in the system and the team.

For instance when Brendan Ryan, your backup shortstop, goes down on April 1^st the GM’s knee jerk reaction was to acquire a 30 year old minor league journeyman from the Houston Astros when Robert Refsnysder is flirting with the .350 mark this spring. The team is now going to give Gregorio Petit a 40 man and 25 man roster spot on the team to sit on the bench and rot just in case the team needs a backup shortstop. You have a backup shortstop, his name is Stephen Drew. Refsnyder has been playing the second base position longer than Drew has after being switched from the outfield by the Yankees and has once again been looked over while having any semblance of hope snatched out from under him this season.

This from the talent evaluator that acquired Javier Vazquez twice, Jeff Weaver, Kevin Brown and a slew of other players for equally as talented, albeit younger, players like Melky Cabrera, Ian Kennedy, Jake Westbrook and others. This from the Good Samaritan that broke his leg sky diving and sleeps outside once a year because he thinks people actually give a crap what he does. Brian, news flash, no one cares. What we ultimately care about is what you do that affects the on the field product inside Yankee Stadium. We don’t care that you had a mistress, that you helped with a terrible Playstation game, or that in a past life you worked and founded the Goodwill and coined the phrase “one man’s garbage is another man’s treasure.” We don’t care!

Now this is usually the part in a roast where we get all serious and we talk about the good things you have done and we thank you for it. Not going to happen. This trade for Petit has really gotten under my skin for whatever reason and cements what everyone else has been saying and everything I have been defending you for. You don’t trust the farm system and you don’t want to win. You want to do just enough to keep your job and keep your healthy Steinbrenner cut paycheck and frankly that’s not going to cut it. Why couldn’t you be a monkey owned by Justin Beiber?